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Archive for May, 2008

An update and general flushing of everything in my head since we last spoke.

pictures coming soon!

Oh my!  It’s been almost 2 months since I’ve rattled off anything of any merit.  But I was here doing the living… the stuff of which these posts are made of.  Sometimes life is an active verb instead of the passive, “write about it and hope it sounds interesting” thing that takes time away from the real and solid.  Where to begin…

If I work backwards I must tell you my 3 are another year older.  It hardly seems possible that my May babies are not-so and DEFINITELY not-so babish anymore.                                                                                                                   I’ve found that 3 and 13 are bookends for childhood.  Looking back I know that a lot of the hard work of raising a child now starts for me with the 3 year old.  OH but the words and phrases… in fact, whole sentences are coming fast and furious now!  One day I explain to M that I’m going to give myself an allergy shot and she cocks her little head and asks “an owie shot?”  Which I suppose would make perfect sense to her since I am indeed giving myself a little owie.                                                                                                                         She is also in the “want to do everything” phase, much to the sometimes ire of her big sister, whom she can often be found clinging to.  She helps with the gardening, still hates to have her head washed (by the way, it’s hairpoo… just so you know), loves “white ice cream”, will pick up and croon over every worm she sees and frequently falls asleep on the couch in the evenings because she’s dropped that afternoon nap.  Her newest love has S climbing the walls.  His cat just had kittens (long story short: we came home to that surprise one afternoon after play practice) and they all love them, but she’s got that 3 year old touchy-feely, “Of Mice and Men” kind of love going on.  Totally freaks him out because he’s just been waiting for this very thing to happen for just about his entire life.  I could have kicked her to the curb for doing her little kitty thing kicked myself for not getting her fixed soon enough… but at least he can say his husbandry skills have been put to practice.  (You’d think they were his own children.)  Anyway, had to teach M to carry them instead of trying to hold them, cause that means squeezing.  Probably something counter-indicated for their little necks.  The only problem now is that their little claws are so dang sharp and scratchy.  Had to teach her not to throw them, too.  But what’s a girl to do when some little creature is shredding your wrists?   

As strong willed as this one is, she’s picking up the concept of doing what Mommy says pretty good.  Most times I can tell her to do something, and while it might take a direct stare and statement from me instead of just a passing comment while I’m working, her response is very often “Oh tay Mommy”, slumped shoulders and a sigh.  She practices “excuse me”, “please” and “thank you” quite nicely for her age, even though she doesn’t do too good at the sitting still and not interrupting thing.  She’s got a lifetime of practice in front of her, though.  She is 110% personality and I’m looking forward to seeing the learning lightbulbs go off for her in the next few years.  I can’t believe she is not my little nursling anymore.  Three years have gone by at the speed of life.

And then I think, well, what about 13 years??  Where’d they go?  Putting aside the childhood ideas and attitudes and moving into that time that makes them giddy with anticipation and me a little twitchy.  THIS is unknown territory for us all, except for my own experiences as a teen.  And I think, the pain is coming (indeed, already is and has for them both) and I just pray they come out stronger on the other side for it.  Their Dad said the other night that we are at the point where we have to think about who we want them to be in 5 years and guide them to it.  I have less problems letting go than he has, but I hate to see them hurt.  Such is life, though.  Friendships will go by the wayside and others will emerge and I just want them to remember that they are my strong son and my strong daughter.  They can do this (but do I have to watch?).  And what’s probably harder for me is the shutting up part.  You know, somebody’s hurting my baby, but I’ve got to hold my tongue with that somebody and only guide my own through the hurt.  I’m not good at staying quiet.  It usually takes it’s toll on my stomach and my sleep. 

P’s birthday celebration is coming up and we are SO excited for it to get here!  We are taking her and some of her friends to the Renaissance Faire a few counties away.  Jousting and mudfights and period clothes, food and “nickle and diming me to death” trinkets and souvenirs.  Couldn’t be any worse than the Shriners Circus we took them to as little ones.  And it is right up her alley, what with the sword dance troupe she’s practiced with this year and our history/drama work we’ve done.  S is of course coming along, but I’ll have to tell you more about his birthday celebration when I know more about it.

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Speaking of… our homeschool group’s production of A Midsummer Night’s Dream was great fun!  After a slow start up for spring weather, we finally had a near perfect day outside for our performance.  I would guess about 75 people were in the audience and the students did a marvelous job!  Some lines were dropped, a dance misplaced, and all of the male parts had to be acted out by one of our dads (S made him a mask for each of his different personas), but anyone who missed it, really missed a great afternoon.  The Moms all put together an appetizer table of fruit, cheese, bread and  meats for afterwards and everything was a smash.  It is so nice when folks just pull together and make things nice for each other and their guests!  S got to be the “sound guy” for our dance music, M danced with her Puck sister in Little Nothings and Puck, for all of her “first time on stage acting” jitters, was as puckish as she could be.  We’ll be doing “Twelfth Night” next year, so you know I’m already planning!

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Granny past away at the beginning of the month… just 1 day and 2 months shy of her 90th birthday.  It’s odd.  The world is definitely more quiet without her there… somewhere.  I’ve missed her for a couple of years already, but it’s different.  I’m glad she’s with her saviour now and He has put her mind at ease about so many things she worried about in her last years.   But I’ve missed her voice.  And now it echos in my brain and I can’t mute it.  My Dear Heart went in just for the funeral.  Didn’t even stop to see his folks.   I can’t explain to you how having him by my side made it possible for me to collapse like I needed to.  As soon as I saw him come through the doors the tears were there and I didn’t need to be strong anymore.  And knowing that he loved my Grandmother as much as I did and would miss her just the same… there is an odd kind of strength in crying together.

She’s already been gone too long.  But I believe for her, she’ll see me in her very next second.

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